On Blooming & Becoming

Some blooming processes take more time than others. Patience is a virtue. Sometimes the blooms that take the longest to bloom end up being the most beautiful & strongest ones.

To me, the process of becoming is a beautiful one.

This little flower represents what I am at this point, and what I think I'm capable of. It's not much as you can see - but I'd like to think that once the process is complete, I am, and will become, a valuable flower with the purpose of making this world I am placed in a meaningful, liveable, and beautiful one.

Flowers start to slowly open up its petals to the world given time and space to do so. The same is with people. In this process, we start to learn and open up, not shying away from who we are. We begin getting involved with things that we would have never thought of doing before. We leave our comfort zones. In time, we learn that the most important thing is to be fearless about being yourself . To not being afraid to show the world who you are, what you can offer.

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We're all different - we have our upbringing, our past, our experiences to blame for that. But this doesn't mean you have to ignore the others planted around you. Sure, you’re unique. Literally, no one is exactly like you - but don’t discount the fact that you are not alone in this world.

This is a lesson that I constantly remind myself. I know I can be a little selfish. Entitled even. I find myself asking a lot of questions. Why do I always have to adjust to the people around me? Why am I always the one having to go out of my way for others? When will it be my turn for people to respect and adjust to me?

But as it turns out, we jut have to respect this process. We all need to adjust to one another. That’s how we co-exist. We are the most social of mammals. No human being could become a fully-grown adult alone. We’re utterly dependent on each other. Sure, there will be days that you’ll find yourself adjusting more than you are willing to. In order to keep people in harmony, we need to accept that we are different. Allow this diversity to unite is by simply working together.

No person can (and will ever) fully understand what you are going through. The same goes for you not understanding others. Ganun talaga, but this shouldn’t stop you from loving diversity. Embrace the uniqueness that’s in you - but don’t let it get to your head. Have respect. Be open. Accept others.

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Don’t let the diversity bother you. Don't let it be a factor in determining your worthI

Often times, I feel insecure. I tend to compare myself to others. I feel I’m surrounded by a lot of great people… which makes me feel like I’m a piece of shit that doesn’t deserve to even be amidst these brilliant minds.

Bakit di ako kasing-talino ng iba? Why don’t I know anything?
Am I stupid? Why do I feel like my mind is so limited compared to others?
Why can’t I ever feel confident about myself? Why am I so easily intimidated?

I will never feel like I’m enough… but I am enough. There’s always room to grow - room for sunlight to work its magic, or room for my roots to grow deeper. It doesn’t mean I suck.

Seriously, I should stop this self-hate. Admittedly, there’s no point in asking these questions. Each bloom in this world is beautiful in its own way. If I can see the world that way, shouldn’t I see myself in the same way?

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The world is our garden and we all are the blooms that can make it better. I have to remind myself of this. I am not perfect, nor will I never be. But I know, once I've journeyed through the path set for me, I will bloom and I will be more than what I think of myself; more than what the world expects.

It takes time. There’s no need to rush. Respect the process.

Writing this to remind myself & [hopefully] to help those who probably are feeling the same way. I really just have days where I want to pour my thoughts and feelings.

I guess this is one of those days… but hey, I’m trying to look at everything from a positive point of view, so good job, RJ! Hahaha.